Gender is a funny thing. Apparently the universe was not sending me "girl" signs, but in fact, I was making them up in my head. I admitted this to very few people, but the main reason I decided to find out the gender ahead of time is because I thought I wanted a girl so badly that I didn't want to be disappointed at birth if it was a boy, I wanted some time to ease into it. Most of you know, I'm a big girly-girl. Love pink. Love sparkles. Love Barbies and horses. And there's a good chance we're only having one child, so I thought I would be devastated with a boy.
Well, when we were in the ultrasound, I immediately saw the boy parts. It took the technician about 20 minutes to get around to actually telling us that it was a boy. And when he did, I started crying right away. I could tell Eric was thinking, oh no... she's gonna have a meltdown. But I realized immediately that I was crying from happiness, that a boy was wonderful.
My dreams of dressing a baby girl in pink cowboy boots and bows quickly turned to dreams of raising a boy to be an intelligent, courteous and respectful man. Suddenly all of my short term parenting goals of braided hair and dolls morphed into a life long mission of raising a human being. And I realized what an honor it is to raise a good man. I'm surrounded by them. My grandfathers, father, brothers, husband, brother-in-law - these are all men who treat woman well, have amazing senses of humor and make the world a better place. And there are incredible women behind each of these men... in most cases, many women. But it all starts with one very special woman. A mother. And now I'm convinced, to be a mother to a good man, must be one of the greatest feelings in the world.
And although I get sad sometimes when I see frilly dresses in the tiniest sizes, I did find a pink onesie that reads "Real Men Wear Pink." Totally mine.
